Handles, knobs and things that squeak

It's January, and the New Year is filled with promise. Magazines are busy making our resolutions. Telling us how we can do better in 2010; shed those extra pounds, declutter our home, find love and have biceps like Michele (all within 28 days or less).

As I thought about what to write, I wondered what I would want to read about so early in the month; post Christmas, in the cold New Jersey Winter, with a pimple on my chin from eating too many chocolate truffles.
Handles, knobs and hardware was what I decided on, for no reason other than it being a random thought in my head. I think they deserve their 15 minutes just like everybody else, so here goes.

To me, they really are the accessories in a home, when replaced they should always be given more than a passing thought. Unfortunately they have become more of a designer item over the last few years, and some options have become more expensive than they should be. However, with a bit of time and planning you can change the look of a door or cupboard (cabinet) quite easily for a small amount of money.

When changing old hardware, stainless steel (or brushed nickel) in a sleek, modern design is often the first choice. But, be careful, sometimes our quest for something new becomes more important than finding something that coordinates with our current home. I love these sleek handles as much as anyone, but take some time to see what is really available before making your final purchase. It will look silly if it doesn't match, never mind the money you will have spent. Especially when it comes to kitchen cabinets, at several dollars each the cost can be more than you anticipated.

Another thing to remember is the distance between the screws when measuring for new handles. They can vary from 2 - 3 inches, or more, and unless you are prepared to drill new holes or patch old ones, it is easier to find ones that line up with what you already have. If you are not sure, unscrew an old handle and take it with you to the store. Luckily, most new items are returnable so you can buy a few and try them before committing to your decision.

A few years ago I changed all the handles and door pulls in my kitchen. I didn't like the shape or the feel of the old ones (they were brass, made to look a bit like bamboo and are a common design in a lot of older kitchens). I also wanted my kitchen to look less like a store bought "kit," and more like a room that had evolved over time. I didn't like the cabinets, but that's another, more expensive problem (see the Kitchen Envy blog for the full story).

After painting the upper oak cabinets with a creamy enamal, I knew without a doubt that I wanted to put glass knobs on them. Because I was replacing the door handles with a knob, I did have to fill the leftover screw holes with wood putty and sand them down before painting. It was a small amount of prep that was made easier because of the paint (a wood stain would never have completely blended with the putty. Isn't putty a funny word?). The bottom cabinets, however, really annoyed me, so my plan was to make them cleverly disappear into their ever-present, universe of oak.

Once I had the ideas in my head, I began to look. What I found was that a lot of knobs are not exactly what they say they are. Glass is often acrylic, wood is sometimes a soft composit and metal can often be a less expensive version treated to look like the real thing. Fortunately, you can usually tell by the feel and weight of them. But if you like it, buy it (fake or not)! I ended up buying a "lot" of glass knobs on ebay for about $2. each, a local Home store wanted $4. each for new, acrylic versions of the same thing. If you do buy them on ebay, or from a second hand shop, make sure they come with the screw attachments. If they don't, it can be a real pain to find ones that match exactly.

I then purchased unfinished, plain, wooden handles for the bottom cabinets which I stained to match the cabinets themselves. My theory was that by having the handles match the cabinets they would be less noticeable. I just bought the smallest pot of stain, in an oak color, and dabbed it onto the handles. The handles cost a dollar each and the stain about $4.

The largest investment in hardware should be your time. When choosing it yourself, it really is something that you need to see, in your home, to decide whether or not it is right. Sometimes what looks lovely in a shop can look a little insane when you put it in your kitchen and multiply it by 16.....

Believe in yourself.

I am very distracted by the trees outside my window. It is brittle and cold; the tops of the trees are clattering against each other in the wind. The ground is covered in white snow and the sky is as blue as can be. It is too beautiful to be working. How did this happen? When did I start allowing myself to be so captivated by such a simple thing?

At some time in our lives we will all experience a disruption, something that forces us to make decisions and choose to either go forward or stay where we are. Even if we choose to stay where we are the world continues to move around us, making it almost impossible to keep still. Over time we have to move, whether we like it or not.

How we move is up to us. No-one can do it for us and no-one else is responsible. For myself, I have found that I began to believe in the magic of the most simplest of things. A twig, holding fast onto the ice that fell the night before, glistens more than any diamond I have ever seen (maybe I need to see a few more diamonds just to be sure :-) I love to look at sharpened pencils, sitting in a cup (I have never liked pens, so am constantly buying pencils, both mechanical and old-fashioned ones. To me there is beauty whenever I use one, the lead giving slightly with a softness as it writes (or draws) on a piece of paper.

I know I am a dreamer, and this often creates problems when I am faced with technology or an over scheduled lifestyle (occasionally I have to schedule time alone, to be silent). But I also know that when I recognize this part of me it becomes a strength that allows me to enjoy the more mundane aspects of my life.

To tie this into my decorating life is a bit of a stretch, I know, but I will try. At the moment there are a million things to be done, it's the Christmas season and I am going on vacation next week. My house is in desperate need of a cleaning, but if I am honest, it is not important to me. My priority is to decorate the house, buy presents, pay attention to the people that I love and keep the ice off the driveway. Cleaning the house is irrelevant. I know that when the other things are done I will clean the house - maybe not perfectly, but it will be enough for me.

Ask yourself what you would really like to do right now. Whether it is cleaning the house, reading a magazine, decorating the outside with moving reindeer, checking homework, baking, buying a new moisturizer or watering your plants, then that is what you should do right now. If you do what is important to you first, then you will have the peace of mind, and the motivation, to get the other things done.

Stop fighting against who you are. Find what your strength is and use that to deal with your life. I know I seem to be advocating taking the easy way out, but I have found that if we find as much pleasure as we can in our everyday life then it makes dealing with the other stuff so much easier.

I met someone recently who wanted advice. As I got to know her I realized that my life and my opinions were nothing more (or less) than what worked for me. To gather ideas and opinions is always one of the best ways to go forward, but in the end we have to sift through what we are given and accept who we are. We are far more likeable when we are ourselves and, believe it or not, it is easier.

As grown-ups we still fall prey to peer pressure, especially around the Holiday season, but if our heart is not in it then it is nothing more than an illusion. An exhausting exercise in trying to please others. Try to stay focused on what is important to you. Your family and friends will notice the difference, and you may just feel a little happier inside.

Believe it or not, I had originally drafted a gigantic article on decorating, but I think you've probably heard the ideas all before (pinecones, bulbs, berries, wreaths, ornaments in bowls etc) so I won't print it. Who needs to be told more things that they "should" be doing by someone who has time to write a blog?

I would, however, always recommend making wishes.

Get some plain, round glass ornaments. Get little strips of paper (1/2 inch by 3 inches) and ask friends and family to write a wish on the paper. Roll it up tightly, carefully take the cap off the ornament and put it inside.
Each year you can add another wish (or, you could ceremoniously smash them open and see if they have come true).

See you all in the New Year.
With love
Wendy

Is Clutter a dirty word?

With the Holidays fast approaching I have noticed my home has become to sprout little piles of miscellany, carefully covering any flat surface they can inhabit. As I came upstairs with my cup of tea I smiled to myself; my dining room table reminded me of a friend's house which is constantly filled with little piles of books. Dozens of them; all neat, waiting to be read, in categories that are the constant decoration in his home. My dining room table has now become the same way; we are eating breakfast in puzzle formation, moving each pile around to make room for another.

I aspire to be a minimalist, a person who has very little clutter and is organized, but it doesn't seem to happen. I wish I knew where other people put their bills and library books. Scraps of paper with phone numbers, DVDs to be returned and receipts to take to the dry cleaners. Where do they all go? Are they piled in an office and dealt with once a week, accompanied by a glass of wine and an aspirin? Are people so efficient that they have baskets by the door for things that need to be returned? Are bills highlighted, pre-stamped and filed according to date?

For me, I am a bit inbetween. I don't want my clutter to become decoration, but I convince myself that as long as it is in neat piles, and the bills are paid on time, I am organized.

One thing I have realized is that my clutter stems from a need to be able to see things. If I can't see what I have then I tend to forget. I need visual reminders of things I need to do, and as I am inspired by what I see, I seem to be predisposed to live in a loosely haphazard, decorative way.

With Thanksgiving and Christmas almost here I thought I would write a few of my own ideas on how I try to keep ahead of the clutter and staying organized without making myself crazy.

- Spend a few minutes each night writing out what you need to do the next day. It will help you sleep better.
- If you send out a lot of cards at this time of year, keep them in a box with a pen, your address book, stamps and labels, ready to work on when you have time. Make a note on your calendar to remind you to write them. Allocate enough time, over several days if needed. Send them off as soon as they are done.
- Plan who you need to buy for and write a list of ideas (make a budget). If you are buying online try to consolidate as much as possible. Many places offer free shipping if you spend over a certain amount, plus it's easier to keep track of your orders if you just use one or two places.
(www.amazon.com and www.anthropologie.com are very good for inexpensive and unique gifts)
- Go through the mail when it arrives and discard what you don't want immediately. Especially at this time of year; don't keep catalogs and "free offer" coupons unless you were planning on buying from them anyway.
- Pay bills early if you are going to be away over the Holidays. Don't be caught by bank closings and late fees.
- Hang a sturdy bag on the door handle and put in it anything that needs to be returned or dropped off. Take it with you each time you leave the house.
- Keep pens, pencils and a good supply of paper by the telephone, computer and in the car.
- Clean out your car each week. Or, put a medium sized container in the trunk and throw absolutely everything in there (get the kids to pitch it over the back seat). When it gets filled with too much stuff, take it into the house and go through it.

Finally, if it all gets too much, go to bed with a book and a bar of chocolate.

Italy, or somewhere else.

I am having a Sophia Loren moment. It is 40 degrees Fahrenheit outside (4 Celsius) but I am waltzing around the house in a long skirt and a small cardigan, barefoot, pretending I am in Italy. In my head it is 1968, a more elegant time, and I am about to sit down at an old typewriter to finish my manuscript. For me, this counteracts the dull, coldness of the outside and helps me to focus. It makes me smile as I work. As I begin, I contemplate how pretending to be something we are not can transform us, in our minds, into something else. By deliberately capturing a specific notion in our head we can influence our emotions, and therefore change the way we feel. This logically (or illogically) tells me that I can do the same thing in my house.

Using the transformation idea I am thinking about changing my living room. It is looking a bit stale. It has been the same way for several months now, and although I like the eclectic feel, and the colors, I think it looks a bit too composed. If we leave our homes and accessories the same way for too long it becomes like wallpaper, we don't see what we have anymore and even the most arresting design will become boring.

I have decided to decorate the room around an idea, my focus is on the end result, not the process. My first thought is that I want to defy the weather outside and make the room appear warmer, like my sunny, Italian daydream. However, my visions of sandstone steps and blue oceans are abruptly shattered by the harsh reality of at least five months of Winter. I save Italy for another day, because I know that when it is freezing cold what I really need is to feel warm and comfortable. Maybe more English cottage (or pub) than Italian villa.

As soon as I have the idea, my writing becomes distracted. I want to move the sofa and I am doing a mental inventory of all the other furniture that I have around the house. I need some unexpected pieces, maybe an old wooden bench from outside, or some bricks? Don't ask me what I would do with the bricks, but they are lovely, hand-cast and full of character (a dear friend found them years ago, by a dumpster. We carried them away a few at a time when no-one was looking). I will find a place for the bricks.

I might have to add some woollen plaid blankets somewhere. When I say "somewhere", what I kindly mean is to cover the part of the sofa that the cat has shredded. Unfortunately, I always have to drape a blanket over that corner, but fortunately for me the sofa is quite ugly so any distraction is always a good one.


In my head my cottage idea cannot have too much pattern. I want it to look ridiculously cluttered, without being messy. A place where you know you can curl up for hours; tucked away amidst the pattern and the organized chaos, sneaking little pockets of time protecting yourself from the nasty cold outside.

I know this is one of my wandering-off-on-a-tangent posts, but truly, sometimes, we should let our imagination do the decorating for us. We don't need to spend hundreds of dollars to create a new look in our home. What we do need, however, is a positive thought, an inspiration or an idea. We need a direction. Instead of focusing on what we don't have, or what we think we need, think about what we want and then figure out how to get there. If I just said that I hated my living room I would be instantly creating a dead end for myself, it is a negative thought that will put me at a standstill. But, if I think about what I want my living room to be eg. warm, cozy, cluttered (I know, go figure!) then I am putting a positive idea into my head. A positive idea that makes me think of the possibilities instead of the limitations.

So, next time you want to redecorate, work backwards, think about the end result. Go barefoot if it helps....

Gift giving - naturally.

It’s Friday. It’s raining. I have good hair. I am meeting my dear friend for lunch today, at her house, and I want to take her a present. I don’t have to. I’ve reached that strangely grown-up time in my life where I don’t take a present to somebody’s home unless I really want to (and I truly enjoy being with that person). This does beg the question, why do we go to someones home if we don't like them? But that's another story.

But it’s raining. And, much as I love her, I don’t want to go out into the rain, to the shops, because I am not even sure what I want to take.

As I got ready I thought about the whole idea of giving presents; for some people it is an obligation, a nuisance, and for others it is a joy and a demonstration of their feelings. My theory is that if we want to do things that make people happy then it shouldn't be complicated (and it should make us happy too).

So, with that in mind I started to think about what to take to my friend. Hydrangeas are my first thought. My garden is filled with Hydrangeas of all colors and sizes but, aside from the fact that they are laden with rain, they take up a lot of space on a table and would need a large vase to hold them. I decide to wander around my garden for inspiration (in the aforementioned drizzly rain). I have a Thyme plant on the back step. With frost looming I thought that would be a good gift. My friend loves to cook and eat fresh, organic produce. Perfect. I bring it inside, pick out the dead leaves that had taken residence, washed the excess dirt off and prune it so that it looks cared for.

Turns out it looked so happy in my kitchen that I put it on my windowsill, and decided not to give it away afterall.

I then remembered I had some more herbs, which I had planted in a half-barrel, in a rather dismal attempt to try and grow a Mediterranean garden. How ironic, it looked like rubbish all year and now, as Winter approaches, it decides to take on some form of fabulousness! I dug up the large, fluffy Oregano and went to look for one of my favorite terracotta pots (I found a pile of old, odd shaped pots just lying on the side of the road years ago, abandoned. I like to imagine they have lived a long, interesting life, squirreled away in some secret garden – maybe even a castle courtyyard overlooking a cliff). I planted the Oregano in one of these pots and put a rock on the side for decoration (in reality it was to stop the plant from tipping out). Found a small china saucer to put underneath it and I was done. It would look at home in anyone’s kitchen.

Anyway, after potting my herb plant I wanted to share my ideas for gift-giving (not the Wedding sort, just the everyday, I’m happy to see you, sort).

- My first idea is to always shop at home first. I know as I write this that it does take a bit of forethought, but overtime it will become a habit, and you will be surprised at how much you can improvise with what you have around you. I love to bake, but I also know that when I don’t have all the ingredients there are some delicious box/refrigerator items. Brownie mixes (Ghirardelli) and sweet Bread mixes (Krusteaz) are always very good (you can easily add extra chocolate, nuts or dried fruit to these too without changing the cooking time). Don’t mean to be rude, but steer clear of the cut and slice cookies in the refrigerator section, buy a box of pre-made cookies instead.
- Check your pantry cupboards. Do you have something delicious that hasn’t expired? (e.g. imported box of tea, cookies, specialty jam, hot-chocolate and marshmallows). Unopened of course.
- Flowers or plants from the garden that you can pick (or dig up)?
- If I have nothing at home then I do head to the shops, but admittedly I usually spend a few moments before I go, thinking about my budget and planning what I would like to buy. This saves time and stress.
- Don’t overlook the beauty of seasonal fruit and vegetables. Find the absolute best you can, put them in a clear cellophane bag and tie with a ribbon (grapes, peaches, asparagus, tomatoes on the vine, fresh cranberries). Miniature fruit is another one of my favorites, especially in the Fall (e.g. lady apples, clementines, forelle pears).
- Bottle of wine from your home town (or country) or one that has a particularly funny label on it (Australian ones especially, have a lot of funny names and pictures and are often around $10).
- Flowers or plants from the supermarket. Find the most natural looking bunch of flowers there (gerberas, sunflowers, chrysanthemums, tulips etc). Ask for a cellophane floral sleeve to put them in. These keep them fresh, and always make your gift look a bit nicer without being too fussy. Remove any baby’s breathe, ferns, rubber bands, labels or price tags. Cut the stems all the same length. Place back inside the cellophane bag and either take as is, wrap in gift wrap or tie a ribbon around the middle. Fold down or cut the cellophane neatly if it is too high.
- Plants. Same idea. Go to the supermarket and pick something natural. Remove any garish decorations, price tags etc (if you need the care label try to hide it, or just give it to them later).If the plastic pot is covered in a foil or paper sleeve that you don’t like, change it. Take it off, put a piece of plastic (or a plastic bag) over the holes then cover with a square of your own wrapping paper. Tie with a ribbon, or, for a quieter look, just carefully tape the wrapping paper to itself so that it doesn’t fall off. Even easier, just take all the extras off, put some tissue in a bag and put the “nude” plant in the bag, letting it peek out the top.
- Inexpensive book that you know pertains to that person’s life at the moment (e.g. the funny side of parenting for a mother raising teenagers).
- Chocolate, a really delicious bar. Wrap it as if it is the most precious thing in the world.
- Daily desk calendar of their favorite indulgence (travel, shoes, handbags…)
- Anything that they love (favorite candy bar, shampoo, soap, beer, lip-gloss, Twinkies etc)
- A balloon. Who doesn’t love a balloon?

Well, you get the idea, the list could go on; but the point is that with just a little time and thought (and not a lot of money) it is very easy to give gifts to people that we care about.